Monday, 31 March 2014

Mum without a Mum

After losing my mum very suddenly a few years ago it tore my world apart.
Mother Day is always a difficult time of the year for me as Ive lost both my Nan and Mum and seem to get emotional at the simplest of things for example this morning we popped into Asda and while waiting to pay i went into a world of my own watching people busily rush by then I noticed a woman who had the biggest bunch of roses from the shop....her partner said 'by god Hun.....they are £30' to which she replied 'only the best for my Mum'.  She was right! Mums deserve the best!
That triggered me and i could feel myself getting all tearful as i started to look at everyone buying flowers for their mums and Nans.....Why was mine taken away? I want to give my Mum the biggest bunch of flowers and watch her smile with joy when i hand them over to her followed by a huge cuddle and kiss...but i cant. Yes i could put them on the grave but its not the same.

I get envious of women that i see with their mums and i get angry at people who don't respect their Mums. They aren't going to be there forever and i certainly didn't expect to lose my mum before she was 50.

If you are reading this and you have lost your mum you will know exactly how i feel. We would give the world to see them, cuddle them and kiss them and chat to them about girly things and have them there to give advise.....but our opportunity has gone.

If you are reading this and you are lucky to have your mums and grand mothers here this is what my advice would be...

  • Don't be embarrassed to tell them you love them as often as you can. It can never be said too much.
  • Its easy to say don't argue but having a few cross words is part and parcel of parent and child relationships, however make up before you go out or before you go to sleep. I argued with my mum before she dies and unfortunately didn't get change to say sorry and make up.
  • Treat her....take her our shopping..even if its just for a browse, treat her to afternoon tea or lunch or even just a girly night in with a bottle of wine.
  • Don't wait for her birthday, mothers day or Christmas to let her know what she means to you! 
I'm not telling you how you should manage your relationship with your mum I'm just letting you know about the things i wish I'd done more and i wouldn't have lived with regrets and guilt after i lost her.

I cant bring my Mum back but you can make the most of your Mums before something happens to them and your chance is taken away.

To everyone whos Mum has passed away.....Keep their memory strong, keep your head and chin up (even if it falls from time to time), make the woman who you called Mum so proud. Treasure each moment you shared together. Cry tears because they arent here and miss them with all your heart. Its good to let it out.
Stay strong
All my love!
If anyone is in the same situation as me and would like to talk please feel free to email me 


  1. My mom has thyroid cancer and I can loose her anytime...Since May last year, I have breast cancer......

  2. Aww my gosh I'm so sorry to hear that Elena x